Guest Contributor: Reflection on the 50th Anniversary of the Lincoln Square Synagogue Women’s Tefillah Group
This Simchat Torah marks the 50th anniversary of the Lincoln Square Synagogue Women’s Tefillah [Prayer] Group. And I speak today to praise, thank and congratulate the Women’s Tefillah Group on 50 incredible years.
Before I get to some more substantive reflections on the Women's Tefillah Group, I want to congratulate them—every one of the thousands of women, who have taken part, had opportunities to lead and be involved in services, read from, even touch, a Sefer Torah [Torah scroll] they wouldn’t have got elsewhere. To the hundreds of Bat Mitzvah girls who got to celebrate in a way they wanted. And to the leadership who have, while much else from that era in shul [synagogue] has faded away, remained, strong, committed, enthusiastic and deeply excited for future growth and new horizons.
After 50 years many things have either petered out or gone on to large-scale adoption or acceptance. The Women’s Tefillah Group in our shul is certainly in the latter category, but that’s not true in the wider world, and as I will explain I think that is deeply, deeply regrettable.
It was certainly deeply controversial at the time, and remains so, if not at LSS, but sadly in much of the Jewish World. It invited no small amount of debate, attacks—some reasoned and thoughtful, some, as you can imagine, hostile, belittling and embarrassing.
So, what can we say about that 50 years later?
Well, I actually wanted to give a full throttled defense of the Women’s Tefillah Group—but I feel that is inappropriate – not just because this is a drasha [lecture] not a shiur [seminar], but because this is a celebration, a birthday and an anniversary. One does not show up to a birthday party prepared to explain why on balance it is good that the person exists as opposed to not existing, and frankly, it must be absolutely exhausting for advocates of a prominent place for women in Judaism to be ALWAYS having to defend, or debate what they do, in a way that men just don’t need to.
And in congratulating them, I want to briefly touch on three extremely important, relevant statements by Torah leaders.
A number of years ago the formidable Rabbanit Chana Henkin, founder of the Yoetzet Halacha program, dean and founder of Nishmat, spoke at LSS. And she made an observation that has stayed with me ever since. Halacha does not change. That is, the fundamentals of Torah, the Mitzvot [commandments], and the world view of chazal [rabbinic sages] and their underlying way of studying and transmitting Torah—one of them being that men and women have different chiyuvim—obligations and demands—those are eternal. Eternal.
But Psak Halacha—how those principles are put into actual practice—can indeed change. Do change. That's why 100 years ago Bais Yaakov Torah study for Women was invented, and many other ways of keeping traditional Judaism strong, which had not been countenanced before, were also invented.
That's the first memorable thing.
The second is the much-quoted position of Rav Moshe Feinstein zt’l on Jewish Feminism. This stems from exactly this time, around 50 years ago—when Jewish feminism was seen as a growing force, and by many Orthodox rabbis as a terrible threat to Judaism.
And Rabbi Yehuda Kelemer, then a rabbi in Boston, wrote to Rav Moshe. He was actually asking about a woman wearing tzitzit—and Rav Moshe replied that women can indeed do mitzvot they are not obligated to do, and according to Ashkenazi practice make Brachot [blessings] before doing so. But then Rav Moshe goes on to say something I feel is more misquoted than not. He raises the question of “motivation.” Motivation indeed is an important, valid issue. We spend much of Yom Kippur exploring our motivations.
And Rav Moshe writes:
אבל פשוט שהוא רק בחשקה נפשה לקיים מצות אף כשלא נצטוותה, אבל מכיון שאינו לכוונה זו אלא מצד תורעמותה על השי"ת ועל תורתו אין זה מעשה מצוה כלל אלא אדרבה מעשה איסור שהאיסור דכפירה שחושבת דשייך שיהיה איזה חלוף בדיני התורה היא עושית גם במעשה שחמיר
If the motivation is because the person’s soul yearns to keep the Mitzvot, even if she has not been commanded, that is praiseworthy. However, if the intention is a protest against Hashem [G-d] and His Torah, then this is not a Mitzvah at all, on the contrary it is a forbidden action if it stems from a desire to try to change the Torah.
I think that after 50 years the Women’s Tefillah Group at LSS has answered that question, time and time again. And although Rav Moshe doesn’t address this, and I would absolutely never put words into the mouth of any Gadol BaTorah [Torah giant], I think if he was asked he may well agree that if the motivation was, as with Sarah Schenirer, the founder of Bais Yaakov, to stop a desertion from Judaism, to provide a meaningful Torah experience in a halachically acceptable way, in a world that offers equality to women in all areas except the ritual sphere of religion, he may well agree that this too is what he terms ‘yearning to keep the Mitzvot, even if she has not been commanded’.
But the last source I want to quote is something I am using to challenge myself.
It comes from one of my rabbinic heroes, the author of Sreidi Aish, Rav Yaakov Yechiel Weinberg. In 1961 Rabbi Weinberg wrote to a rabbi in Paris who had asked for his advice regarding his attempts to win people back to shul attendance. The rabbi had started a minyan [communal prayer service] for young people, and had either removed or lowered the mechitza [partition separating men and women] and attracted considerable criticism from the more traditional community in Paris.
Rabbi Weinberg first empathized with the rabbi, lauding him for trying to do something for Judaism while being attacked by people who seemed absolutely interested in the problems of assimilation and disaffiliation. Rabbi Weinberg then went on to discuss the importance of a proper Mechitza, telling him to follow Rav Moshe Feinstein’s rulings on the matter. And after emphasizing the importance of making sure that women are not excluded from shul or made to feel they have no place, he went on to say words that I think about all the time.
ועצתי, עצת זקן ובעל נסיון, שלא להתעקש נגד היראים אף שהם רק מתי מעט, שבאם היראים ההם יעזבו את הקהילה יוציאו שם רע על קהילתו שהיא קהילה ריפורמית,וסופה של מחלוקת זו תביא לידי הריסת הקהילה, ח"ו.
And my advice, the advice of an old man with much experience, is not to contend with the Yeraim (the ‘right wing’), even if they are only few in number. For if they were to leave the community, a bad name would go out that this is a reform community, and the end result would be the destruction of the community, G-d forbid.
And, as I say, I think about those words all the time. Getting the balance right.
And of course, Rabbi Weinberg was correct. No rabbi should ever place themselves and certainly not their shul outside of orthodoxy.
But as much as I have relied on, and shared with other rabbis, these wise words of the Seridei Aish, “don’t make your shul a place frum [observant] people wouldn’t daven [pray]”—as important as they are—I do not believe that Rabbi Weinberg intended them to be used as a crutch, an excuse to be given to justify the rabbi or shuls complete lack of interest in doing anything at all to enhance the world of religious experiences for women.
I recently shared these words with a rabbi who had asked my opinion on some questions to do with Women and Shul, and I almost immediately regretted it. Because I had a feeling that he would use them as a reason to do absolutely nothing.
A number of years ago I was asked to be a guest speaker at a Modern Orthodox Shul in New Jersey. When asked for a list of topics, I offered to give a shiur [seminar] on exactly this topic - actually, to teach the responsa of Rabbi Wienberg that I have been quoting from. The rabbi responded, in a slightly panicky tone “Not that topic—this is not an issue in our community. The women aren’t interested in that kind of thing.”
What he meant, it became clear after I had asked around a little, is that the women in that community had long ago learned not to even bother trying to raise the topic with the Rabbi, and many of them had completely checked out from coming to shul.
So what can we say on the 50th anniversary of the Women’s Tefillah Group of LSS. I think we can say, as well as “Mazal Tov” [congratulations], as well as “ad120” [may you do this until age 120], a profound “thank you” for keeping the flag flying in the face of opposition and belittling remarks.
And I personally add that in my opinion it is a crying shame that Women’s Tefillah Groups never became more accepted in Modern Orthodox communities. If the evidence of 50 years of dedication and leadership is anything to go by, what shul would not have benefited from the same leadership and energy, how many thousands of women who have been made to feel completely disenfranchised would have been able to have a halachic way to lead tefillot [prayers], celebrate bat mitzvot, and get at least some of the same sense of belonging and responsibility that men do?
How many women—and men for that matter–would have remained in our communities?
But perhaps no less importantly—and I pledge to keep these remarks in when I circulate this speech after Yom Tov [the holiday] – I think it would have helped halt a very negative trend in today’s Jewish communities. That is, when communities become more religious – which is a wonderful thing—it is women who are too often asked to pay the price.
When mechitzas [partitions separating men and women] become taller and more opaque, when there are more and more events—inspirational onegs [festive gatherings], learning projects, siyumim [celebration of completion of study], Father and Son learning, Tishes [feasts], prominent speakers—there is a growing trend to make all of these things “Men Only.” There is a phenomenally exciting new learning program that is making headway in the Modern Orthodox community but it is only being made available for men, despite the fact that women nowadays study Torah at the highest level in seminaries in Israel and in Stern College.
Why? Why does that always have to be the case?
And when women’s events are arranged, they are often nothing close to as powerful or meaningful as what is being offered to men. The more Judaism the better BUT I think that more Women’s Tefillah Group in more shuls would majorly help to prevent this growing and unacceptable erasure of women that is happening in today’s Modern Orthodox world.
And one final thought. For we are about to say Yizkor [memorial prayer said on certain Jewish holidays], and we all have to think about our place in the great scheme of things.
We all, all of us, not just me and the rabbis and clergy—are responsible for Judaism. For keeping it, and for passing it on, pristine, holy, intact.
There is nothing casual about these conversations. Halachic decisions require yirat shamayim [fear and awe of G-d], great deliberation, reverence and fear of making a misstep. The stakes are enormous.
Some innovations in Judaism in retrospect seem so obvious as to make us wonder what the fuss was about—after all sermons in the English language were once deeply controversial….
On the other hand, some innovations were completely disastrous, leading ultimately to the disappearance of an incalculable number of souls.
And that's why these discussions require such yirah [fear and awe of G-d], such patience, such deliberation.
I believe that Judaism is like a precious vessel—it is fragile—for we know how easily it can be broken—it is exquisite and beautiful. Our role is to pass it on—but locking it away, putting it behind glass would kill it. Because Judaism only works if we use it. Use it every day. And our job is to pass it on in a way that is both authentic, but also meaningful and relevant to the next generation.
We inherited a Judaism at both very old and very contemporary, and our job is to make sure the next generations receive nothing less. One has to do one’s best. And one has to have, as Rav Moshe Feinstein reminded us—the right motivations.
Here today we celebrate 50 years of leadership; of making a difference, an impact in the Jewish world. May we all go from Strength to Strength.